The beginning of a new relationship is often looked upon as
the most electric and dizzying; a time when all you can think about is the
awesome woman in your life. Although it may feel like you can do no wrong
during those first few months of being together, there are some things you have
to avoid like the plague.
Certain topics are very delicate at this point, and if you
come on too strong, your girlfriend may take it as a warning sign that you're
looking too far ahead. Go with the flow, live in the moment and take a look at
the following tips that will help your relationship move along swimmingly.
Number 10
While physical attraction was probably what gave you the
courage (or motivation) to initiate a conversation with your woman in the first
place, it is important that you show her that sex need not come first. If you
want to make this relationship a serious one, don't think of sex as a top
priority. This is a great move on your part, as you are showing her how smitten
you are with her mind .
Be patient, establish the strong bond you are yearning for
and the rest will fall into place. Holding off on what your libido is telling
you will pay off in spades in the long run.
Number 9
One small, but important habit that needs to be broken, is
introducing your new woman as your girlfriend. In doing this, you might come
off as insecure, making sure everybody knows you have a girlfriend. You're much
better off simply saying, "This is Mary" to your friends -- they'll
understand the nature of your relationship by the public displays of affection
you shower her with, as well as the little mannerisms couples seem to exhibit.
Don't tell everyone you're dating; instead, simply imply it.
She'll be impressed by the way you show her off without putting her on display.
Number 8
It is quite easy to slip into a comfort zone once you start
settling into a "couple's routine," but the worst thing a man can do
is take his girlfriend for granted. Treating her as a long-time wife in a dull
marriage is not the way to go. If this is already happening, then you have
contributed to your own downfall, as she is probably feeling unwanted and
unappreciated.
No good can come from making her feel like baggage and
letting yourself naïvely think she'll always be there for you. Remember how
lucky you are to be with such a woman and tell her things that will make her
feel special.
Number 7
Although a serious commitment is what you want, there is no
need to pressure her early on. Saying, "I love you" prematurely is a
big no-no, as your girlfriend might feel forced to respond or may even reject
you on the spot. Any talk of the future, like laying out plans for marriage and
kids, can scare a woman off more than your rampant back hair.
Show your affection by reaching for her hand as you walk in
the mall, touching her arm as you converse across the dinner table and making
eye contact when she is talking to you. Don't feel that you have to display
your newfound love right away -- at the beginning of a relationship, it's all
about taking things slow.
Number 6
It is imperative not to get into a pattern of buying your
way into her heart. You may have purchased a tasteful gift in the early stages
of dating, but now that you both feel there is a future together, it's time to
put away the plastic every time you see some nice jewelry.
In addition to that, you're actually wasting your money,
spending it irresponsibly on her instead of saving up for something extremely
significant -- like your future. If you make sound decisions about what to get
her at opportune times, the presents will mean more to her and will leave less
of a dent in your bank account. Neglect showering her with presents early on so
that she doesn't get used to the "princess" treatment.
Number 5
It is true that you should be yourself around your
girlfriend, but remember to hold off on displaying different facets of your
personality until the right time. If you're a great cook, knowledgeable art
lover and even a handyman around the house, don't let her know of your skills
all at once.
One by one, when the need arises, reveal the things you know
she'll love about you. In doing so, you compound her already growing love for
you and offer fresh qualities for her to appreciate. By showing off too much
initially, you leave little to liven the relationship later on.
Number 4
Taking a new girlfriend to a family gathering the first few
months into dating can often be misconstrued as too serious a move. Although
you love your parents and quirky Uncle Bob, it is best to introduce your family
at a time when she'll easily understand your motives and be able to put up with
some uncomfortable questions from a rude grandfather.
Early on, her feelers are busy enough trying to establish if
you are "the one"; throwing family into the mix is simply too much
too soon. Of course, don't shy away from mentioning your love for them and the
fact that your mother will adore her, but keep it at that until the time is
right.
Number 3
You might feel the need to always pour on the charm in her
presence, but this is actually the wrong vibe to emit. Sooner or later, she'll
realize the phoniness of your actions -- your girlfriend wants you , not an
actor. By being "super romantic man" all the time, the originality
and shock value that special nights should provide will be non-existent.
Once in a while, surprising her with a candlelight dinner or
some flowers will score big points, but pick your situations carefully and
spread them out. Let her know that you do in fact have a romantic side, but
tone it down and let little daily actions bear more importance than big
productions.
Number 2
The last thing you want to do at the beginning of a budding
relationship is put her down. More than any other time, it is in the first
stages that you should be open-minded and accepting of her ways and habits.
That is not to say that you should constantly give her a piece of your mind
once you've settled in with her. It's important to keep in mind that you are
walking on thin ice the first couple of months, and if you judge her
immediately and frequently, she'll be out the door in no time.
Hold your tongue, be understanding and be careful with your
words so as not to hurt her. Some would say there is no right time to express
your opinion negatively when a relationship starts, but if you feel a strong
need to do so, make your comment a mere suggestion and not an insult. Instead
of "That dress is ugly," say "I preferred the beautiful black
one you wore on New Year's Eve."
Note: Her annoying habit of asking you a lot of questions is
one thing, but her extremely possessive behavior is another. If there's a
serious issue at hand, it's a good idea to let your new lady know before things
get out of hand.
Number 1
A fundamental issue that is essential in any flourishing
relationship is honesty. Telling lies or omitting pertinent things about
yourself (like "forgetting" to tell her you love partying full tilt
every Saturday night) will only lead to problems later on. Laying your habits
-- and everything else that makes you tick -- out on the table is the only way
to start a relationship you hope will last a long time.
Of course, sometimes little white lies cannot be avoided, but
remember the bottom line: Don't lie about important things. No good can come
from saying you come from a rich family when in fact you don't, or claiming
you're a subdued intellectual when in fact you prefer beer and football to
talking about Tolstoy, any day.
Is this helpful?
Information from askmen.com was used in this report
It is partly useful...
ReplyDeleteHonesty summarize it all
ReplyDelete